Review: White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo

This will not be a comfortable book for white people to read, but that's the point. The premise is basically getting white people to get to grips with the fact that even if they think they're not racist, they are part of the system, the 'white collective' so to speak that perpetuates racism is subtle, non-obvious ways, and then get really defensive when called out on it. Obviously, not many people, particularly white progressives and liberals, want to be accused of racism or think themselves as racist in any way, and the beauty of this book is that it breaks down what it means to be racist and how to view our past behaviours in order to show how we can make it better.

Similarly to examples put forward in "Why I'm No Longer Talking To White People About Race", racist acts don't always manifest in obvious ways, such as using the 'n' word. It can be about black people constantly being passed over for jobs or promotions, despite being as or more qualified than white counterparts. It can be about making 'jokes' about black women's hair. It can be playing into the stereotypes of the angry black person. And for white women, it can be about the weaponisation of their tears, something which has horrible, historical and current associations for black people, (Emmett Till and Amy Cooper being two past and present examples).

When responding to accusations of racism, white people can invariably say things like, "I don't see colour", "that's not what I meant, you're just taking it the wrong way", "I have black friends/wife/husband" etc. But the book, written by a sociologist and 'diversity trainer' who works in predominantly white work places, completely counters that. She says that countless times during sessions, white people want to learn about racism in the abstract, general sense, but get defensive and shut down (sometimes the women cry, completely invalidating the point of the exercise and the Black person who is trying to explain their very real experience), when challenged personally.

The key to being anti-racist and actually helping Black people and PoC is not to pretend racism is not an issue, or insist on your non-racist credentials, but to actually honestly examine past behaviour and how that has affected colleagues/family/friends. In the past, I'm pretty sure I'll have said stuff along the lines of 'I don't see colour' or 'I have a black relative' etc instead of thinking, do I have negative perceptions of X black person and why? Why did I assume the mixed race boy in the room chose my subject because he had to rather than because he wanted to and was actually really good at it?

Actually listening to Black people and PoC, understanding why what you said is problematic and how you can do better, and knowing that being anti-racist is a lifelong journey, is so much more helpful and can help the white collective make much more meaningful 'cross-racial' relationships.

So, like I said, not a comfortable or easy read but go into this with an open mind and be prepared to have honest words with yourself, and I promise the work will be worth it.